There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
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