are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
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