I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
Randomize
