Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
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