we have officially lost it.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize