there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
Randomize
