ya dads aren't the best wingmen
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
