Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
