The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
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