dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
What did we do last night that was yellow?
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
