Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
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