At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
