i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
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