What a fucking waste of an outfit
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
Randomize
