Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
where am i from again
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Randomize
