so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
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