sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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