You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize