He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
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