You just made me feel so damn special
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Randomize
