there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
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