My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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