oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
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