what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Randomize
