yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
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