this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Randomize
