I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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