GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
No subtext here. People are naked.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
Randomize
