well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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