I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Randomize
