This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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