so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
Randomize
