i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
Randomize
