we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize
