we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
