it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
high people should be assigned attendants
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
Randomize
