no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
God I need to hump something, right now.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize