Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
