Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
Randomize
