I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
Randomize
