they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
Randomize
