Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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