u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
we're chasing vodka with high fives
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize
