You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
My vagina just clenched in fear
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
Randomize