We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
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