if you like me you must not know who I am
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
Randomize