Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
