it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize
