; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
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