she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
