So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
